where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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