He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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