a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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