I wanna passion pit in your ass
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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