We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
