Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
