guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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