Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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