i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I party with great urgency now.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
