): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
