i barfeds in our rink
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
