just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
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