You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
