You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
