I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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