i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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