if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
