I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
