I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
