even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
