he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
