That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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