super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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