I smell stomach acid.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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