Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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