you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
