So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize