I wanna passion pit in your ass
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
