ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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