I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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