can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
