Dual....:-)
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
