yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
