i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
