He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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