Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
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