there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
