Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
