dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
