Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize