Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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