we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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