they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize