I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
