Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
