One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
