I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
