my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Randomize
