My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
