Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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